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Posts Tagged ‘Social Networking Enough Already’

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Before I get started on my social networking post, I would like to give a shout out to Alison Hertz and her Doodle Day May challenge. During the challenge, Alison offered a doodle prompt every day in May and we doodled. Then we shared our doodles on her Doodle Day May Facebook page. It was inspirational and fun. I will be posting more about this in the future, but I wanted to mention it today because it truly has been a great experience.

Now on to my intended post. . . .

Have you ever felt like the main character in a horror story titled THE SOCIAL NETWORK MONSTER THAT ATE AN AUTHOR? (And we are talking the author as main character, not the monster 🙂 ) If you have ever felt like the main character, it might be time to reevaluate how you are spending your time and energy.

A while back, I read a Facebook post that went something like this: When I am about to die and my life flashes before my eyes, I’m afraid all I’ll see is Facebook and television. I thought the post was pretty funny. However, as I once heard a famous comedian say, “There is humor in tragedy.”

Back in February, the featured guest blogger for Donna Martin’s Writerly Wisdom series was the award-winning author, Donna M. McDine. The title of this post is “Social Networking Enough Already . . . When It Hinders Your Writing.” Following is a quote from her post.

“Do you want to concentrate on honing your writing skills and writing the best manuscript possible or have hundreds of thousands followers on your social networks with no concrete publishing credits to show for your efforts?”

I made a note of the above quote because I wanted to remember it. I believe it is a good question for writers to ask themselves periodically.

In my January post, A FULFILLING LIFE IS ONE OF BALANCE, I offered an exercise using the Writing Wheel for Creating Balance. Today, I’m wondering if I should have included categories on the wheel for Social Networking and Energy. One of the categories I did offer on the wheel was “Time.” Time is critical in a writer’s life. Time and energy are valuable and limited personal resources. When these resources run dry, so does the opportunity to accomplish our goals. How can a writer maintain balance in life or as a writer if s/he squanders these resources by spending excessive time on social networking?

I feel like I must disclose that I sometimes find myself distracted by social networks and media. After all, I am human. Like time and energy, social media and networking are extremely important and valuable to writers, but if we are not careful, we can be swallowed by the monster and never see the light of a writer’s day – earning concrete publishing credits. Time spent not writing and submitting is time spent not meeting our number one goal.

How are you spending your time?

LET YOUR YEAH MEAN YEAH AND YOUR NO MEAN NO 

When it comes to how we spend our time, one thing we all seem to have in common is an abundance of life choices. We have a never-ending supply of things we feel we must do and things people expect us to do. Then there are all those things that are just too good to pass up. One of the consequences of over choosing is we often end up spending our lives expending ourselves as if we are unlimited, and we are not. When it comes to life choices, one of the most empowering skills we can learn is the ability to say no. The ability to say no to the boss; the spouse; the friends; the TV; the overtime; the recreation and social engagements; social networking and to ourselves. I am not suggesting that we say no to everything. I am suggesting saying no to the combination of things that will create balance when we let them go.

Saying no is a learnable skill, but it is one of the most difficult skills for some women to learn. However, it is one of the most valuable skills because learning to say no becomes a way to honor your values and yourself. Saying no involves choice because when we say no to one thing, we say yes to something else. It is all about choosing to say yes to things that make us more alive and saying no to things that suck the life from us. It is as simple as asking yourself: “What do I want more of in my life?” and “What do I want less of?”

When you first start exercising your right to say no, you might have worries: But saying no is rude. Saying no means, you are not a team player. Saying no means, you are selfish, and on and on it goes. It is important to remember that for every yes you say in life, you are saying no to something else. For example, if someone says yes to working late hours every day, she might be saying no to family and rest. She might be saying yes to her fear of losing her job and yes to powerlessness. Or maybe she is saying no to serenity and yes to security. If someone says no to getting up and exercising in the morning, she might be saying yes to feeling warm and cozy. She might be saying yes to an extra ten pounds or getting more sleep. When a writer says yes to excessive time social networking, she might be saying no to writing. She might be saying no to submitting. And she might be saying no to publication. On the other hand, she might be saying yes to I need a break and a little friendly chatting or learning.

Where and when do you respond with an automatic yes? When and where do you respond with an automatic no? When do you say yes when you really want to say no? When do you say no when you really want to say yes? When does saying yes drain you and saying no energize you? When does saying yes energize you and saying no drain you? Following is a worksheet that might be helpful in evaluating what you say no to when you say yes and what you say yes to when you say no.

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